To Be Awakened
by Mina Kye
Summary: Byakuya is comatose after the Quincy attack. A torn Renji refuses to leave his side as he reflects to their past and is heartbroken by the fact that his lover may never wake up. But he still refuses to give up even when everything is in chaos.
1. Chapter 1

"Byakuya…" said a deep male voice.

_Renji? _Byakuya thought as he silently lay on a bed that was not his own. He was vaguely aware that he was in the fourth division and that he was unable to move or speak. He thought of how he got there, and then he remembered a dark haired Quincy male who had stolen his Bankai.

"Do you plan on waking up for me sometime soon?" The redhead asked and grasped a slender pale hand and brought it to his lips and kissed each soft finger tip.

_How is it I can hear you? _

_I cannot move…_

"You've been asleep for a week already…" Renji whispered again, lacing their fingers together.

_A week…? _

Renji sighed as he sat on the edge of the bed, gazing at his sleeping lover with sad red-brown eyes. "I miss you."

_I miss you too…_

"Renji," A feminine voice called from the door. "How is he?"

_R-Rukia…?_

"He's still sleeping…" The redhead replied sadly, not turning away and moved one of his calloused hands to brush some of the raven hair away from the noble's sleeping face.

Rukia eyes were down casted even as she sat down on the chair next to the bed. "Are you just going to sit here and wait for him to wake?"

Byakuya continued to lay on the bed silently, unable to move his body or speak. He wanted so much to move. At least open his eyes to see his lover and his sister.

The redhead shifted his eyes to smaller fukutaichou. "What else am I supposed to do? I'm not allowed to leave the healing center yet because of my own injuries and the squad is pretty much flattened and many of our officers are here too." He said giving Byakuya's hand a gentle squeeze. "Rikichi is helping me out though with things…poor kid, he watched most of his friends die before he was able to get away."

"Well, at least he was able to live." Rukia said solemnly.

_What do you mean?_

Renji furrowed his brows. "What's up with you? You seem down in the dumps…I know that it's to be expected with what all that is going on but what's wrong?"

Her violet eyes flickered upward to connect with Renji's. "I haven't heard much of anything from the clan…"

_The clan? Ah…Mana…you worry for her…_

As if reading the noble's mind Renji asked what he was aching to know. "Nothing from Mana-san yet?" He asked in concerned tone.

Rukia hesitated for a moment then shook her head. "No,"

Byakuya felt a pang of sadness and worry grow deep inside of him as he listened to their conversation progress.

"Shit…" Renji muttered. "I'm sure she's okay Rukia." He whispered and looking to his best friend's troubled expression.

"You don't know that." Rukia replied dryly and turned her head away to hide the tears that were building up in her eyes.

Renji shook his head. "No, but I choose to believe it." He said with certainty, making Rukia turn back to him with slightly widened eyes. "It's like Byakuya always said; ne? It's an insult to a warrior if you worry about them too much…or something along those lines."

_Baka…_ Byakuya thought; amused. _Although…I am glad you were paying some attention to what I have taught you._

"I believe Nii-sama said it in a way that we shouldn't worry _at all_, Renji."

Renji shrugged slightly. "Maybe," He allowed softly. "but it's human nature to worry a little." He said turning back to his watching his sleeping lover.

Rukia gave him a small smile of gratitude as she stood and walked closer to the redhead and kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks. But that still doesn't help Mana-san."

"Well have you heard _anything_ from the clan?" Renji asked curiously.

Rukia nodded. "I heard that the manor was undamaged besides the guest wing and the gardens are pretty much destroyed. But those can be repaired and replaced." Rukia said sadly and headed for the door of which she can through minutes prior. "Also each noble house has lost many people and most of our council is gone." She added, stopping just shy from the door frame. "So there will be much chaos there. I hope it's resolved before Nii-sama wakes up though…" She trailed off looking away with a furrowed brow and blinking back tears. She knew it wasn't a for sure thing if her brother would ever wake up again…but if he did he would frown upon what was done to his home and his family.

Renji let go of Byakuya's hand gently and slipped off the bed and walked over to the petite Shinigami. He wrapped his arms around her and let her head rest on his chest. "It's going to be okay, Rukia…we'll figure something out and help as much as we can once we are allowed to leave here."

_Gods…I wish I could move…or at least speak…something! _He hated that he couldn't be any comfort to his sister right now.

Rukia nodded wordlessly and burrowed her face in the redhead's chest more. Her shoulders shook as she released her tears, pain, and sadness silently. Renji stood silently, letting her relieve herself of the pent up emotions inside until she was able to recompose and excused herself back to her room.

Renji sighed, watching her retreat down the hall until she was no longer visible from his sight. He turned back into the room his comatose lover inhabited. He frowned deeply and closed the door then walked over to the bedside again. He dropped gracelessly into the chair Rukia sat and pillowed his head on the edge of his lover's sakura scented hair and pillow and intertwined his fingers with Byakuya's again.

"You know," Renji whispered tiredly which made Byakuya wonder how long Renji was there and how long he had been without sleep. "They attacked right when I was about to kiss you…that would have made us official if I was able to do that before they came." A single tear fell from one red-brown eye as Renji closed them and slowly drifted asleep at his lover's side.

* * *

_**((Ello~. I hope you enjoyed this. I know it's kinda like "what the hell is going on? I don't get it at all!". But I promise as the story progresses you will understand more and more. I think this story will be agonizingly slow-pace wise anyway. I'm starting on the next chapter as soon as I post this. Forgive me for the 'out there' start. I was hoping to have it more subtle but that was the first thing that came to mind and I work with whatever my muse gives me. I know I'm not really one to actually go out there and ask for reviews but if you could just slip a few words of what you thought. That would be deeply appreciated. –Love, Mina))**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**((So, since what is happening in the manga is not fitting with what I'm writing here. I'll say it now...this will be slightly AU since it would require me to rewrite the first chapter. But I already had this planned out in my head of how I wanted the story to go so AU as of now. :) I hope you enjoy it anyway. Also…I wanted to try something new with this chapter. So let me know if I succeeded to make it work or not so I know if I can continue this way. :S Oh yes, thank you so much for the reviews, faves, and follows. I really appreciate it! :D))**_

"_Abarai? What do you think you are doing?" I ask, eyeing my red-haired lover in the mirror. _

"_I'm helping you dress." Renji replied simply. _

"_I can see that. What I meant is what are you doing _here_? I believe it is bad luck for us to see one another before the ceremony." _

_He shrugs slightly as he fastens the belt at my waist. "Maybe," He says. "But I think with everything we've been through, that we really shouldn't worry about that…" _

"_Perhaps," I say while nodding. "But still, I am capable of dressing myself." _

_He grins, but says nothing. He takes the top of my kimono from the hanger behind him and helps me slip my arms into it. "I know you are." He finally replies. "I just like to help you though." _

"_I do not need help." I insist, showing a bit of annoyance as I connect my eyes with his again. I adjust the kimono slightly as it reaches my shoulders so I can straighten it more comfortably. I love his presence but his constant want to help me is going to drive me mad._

_I could feel that he kissed my neck and him wrapping his arms around me from behind. "Sorry," He says most sincerely. "I just like to help you. You're always hard on yourself and I want to relieve some of the stress. And with Sora-kun, you're always a bit indifferent with him so I let him see to other things while I try to relax you." _

_I sigh softly and lean into the embrace. I have been on edge a bit but I had thought I hid the discomfort well. I should have known Renji would see through it though. He always had seen through my mask… my seemly calm exterior. I rest my hands on top of Renji's where they lace together on my half clothed stomach. I look into the mirror and my dark eyes connected with warm, but worried red-brown ones again. I take a deep breath and let my head drop onto Renji's shoulder and I close my eyes. "I'm sorry Renji…I did not mean to sound as if I wasn't appreciative but…" I say softly and then am interrupted._

"_But you like to do things on your own and don't want to burden anyone," says Renji, finishing my sentence for me. "I'm aware. But Bya, you know you don't have to bottle things up with me. So what's wrong?" He asks, giving me a gentle squeeze. "You seem on edge about something." _

_I turn my head slightly and eye Renji again, but through the corner of my eye. "Do you really wish to know?" I ask, I know he'll say yes but I don't want to burden him with my thoughts._

_Renji gives a small nod. "Of course I do. What's wrong? Ever since I moved in you've been skittish." _

_I nod in agreement and breath deeply again, letting my eyes slip closed again. "You are aware of the Quincies intent to attack, ne?" I ask, already knowing the answer but waiting for him to confirm it anyway. _

"_Yeah," I hear Renji's reply softly in my ear._

_I stay silent for a moment, just thinking of how to put my thoughts and feelings into words. "I have this feeling…an uneasy one." I finally admit softly, gathering my thoughts as I need. "I'm not sure, but I have this feeling that soon we could possibly be attacked." _

_I can feel Renji's small sad smile as he leans his head down against my neck. He knows… "I wouldn't doubt it." Renji says solemnly. "The Quincies have made their statement clear that they are going to make their move soon." He kisses my cheek and neck, his soft lips warming me. "But I don't want that to take what we have away right now. You and I have been waiting ever since Aizen's defeat for this day." _

_I turn in Renji's arms so I can face him. "We have," I reply, nodding. "I don't plan on having it disrupted by anyone, not the Quincy, the division, or even the Elders." _

_Renji rolls his eyes at this. "You think they'll do something to mess things up?" _

_Smiling sadly, I raise my lips to Renji's forehead. "I don't think they'll be a problem," I say kissing his tattooed brow. "My uncle, Tetsou, may oppose it but I believe that he won't say anything to interfere with our union…" _

_Renji frowns and looks into my grey eyes. "But you think something else will." He says seriously, I could tell it wasn't a question. _

"_Again, it is possible." I allow. "My instincts say that _something_ will happen…but we will just have to make sure we take proper precaution and see to this final step to making us bonded." _

_Renji smiles, bringing his lips close to mine. "We will, no matter what, be married today." He whispers, his tone and eyes holding the promise in them. I smile faintly and close the distance between us. We indulge in many sweet, slow kisses before Renji pulls gently away from me and ties my kimono closed then turns to reach for his own in the closet. I grasp his wrist lightly and he turns his head to me again, his red-brown eyes looking at me questioningly and his head tilted to the side._

"_Let me," I say softly while switching our places so he's in front of the mirror and I get his kimono from the closet. I place it on the hook on the open door where mine was and then I return to where Renji stood only inches away. His eyes are warm and filled with happiness as I look into them through the mirror. I reach my arms around his waist and my hand makes fast work of the tie. As soon as the tie is undone, his yukata falls open. My eyes scan the man in front of me. I always thought he was handsome..._beautiful_. _

_His tattoos always cause something to stir inside me, wanting to trail my fingers and tongue along the large expanse of them. I look to his eyes again. I can see the mildly hungry gaze there. He knows exactly what he does to me. I so much want to indulge in my desire to pleasure the man before me but I know it will have to wait until tonight where we will share our first lovemaking as spouses. _

_I slip the yukata off of his shoulders and then toss it into the laundry basket behind me as I grasp the hakama of his kimono from the hanger. I help him into it, one muscular leg and then the other and pull it up and tie it at his waist. I can see him wince slightly and look at him questioningly. _

_He sees my questioning expression and tries hard to not look as though he is so terribly uncomfortable. But then he sighs. "Do these things always have to be so uncomfortable and scratchy?" He asks, shifting a bit. _

_I chuckle softly. I know exactly what he means. I never really liked the material they used as a default for all formal kimonos. They have rough lining inside which makes it near impossible to not fidget a little to ease the material a bit. "I can have some made for you that are made of a softer material if you wish." I offer, adjusting the hem in the back of his hakama._

_He smiles at this and shakes his head. "No," _

_I blink slowly in confusion. "But, I thought-" _

_He turns suddenly and presses a soft kiss on my lips, stopping my words. "No," he repeats. "I won't have to wear them _that_ often…and even when I do I think I can handle it." He kisses me again as I try to object. "So I'll bear the itchiness these damn things give me as long as I can stand by your side, _always_."_

_I smile softly at that and press my lips to his. How is it that this man ended up in my life and became the love of that life? I want to know how I came to deserve such love and devotion as Renji has to me. He knows I give the same the same to him also. Our love is passionate where Hisana's and my love was gentle. How is it that that place - Inuzuri produced such strong willed people? That is a dreadful and dangerous place but it put the three most important people in to my life. Hisana, my late wife, when I was injured there on a mission, and then Rukia, my sister, when she was at the academy when I finally found her, and now Renji, my fukutaichou, my lover, my best friend. How is it I came to be so lucky to have had these people in my life? _

_I kiss Renji a few more before pulling away and taking the top of the kimono from the hanger. I gently slip it onto his arms and up onto his shoulders. He tries to hide his expression from showing the embarrassing discomfort but his face twists and he frowns that shows just how much he hates this material. I smirk at that as I adjust the hem on the back of his neck. I think will have more kimonos made for him in the softer material so he isn't so uncomfortable. He refused them now but he'll greatly appreciate them later. We will be pretty busy at the time of the cherry blossom viewing which isn't for a month so I will have some made after our honeymoon. _

_I see into the mirror that he's fumbling with the tie a bit. The material of that is irritating his hands. His brows furrow and he glares at it. I chuckle softly and move around to the front of him, taking the tie from his hands and pulling his kimono closed and carefully tying it. _

"_Thanks," he mumbles a bit sheepishly. _

_I nod and place a kiss on his cheek. "You're welcome." _

_I gesture to seat over by the dresser, silently telling him to sit so I can brush out his long red hair. He nods and goes and sits down. I turn to follow as I pick up the brush and pull the hair tie out that had been keeping the tangled locks captive on his head. I carefully brush through the ends, mindful to not tug too hard so I won't hurt him. After a time I finally manage to get all the knots out of the ends and work my way up to the roots of his hair until its length is soft and shiny. I'm not surprised when I hear a light moan from him. He always likes it when I brush his hair, and I have to say I enjoy it as well. It seems easier for me to brush it than him do it his self. He doesn't have the patience or the right amount of gentleness with himself like I do. _

_I separate the sides of his hair into two strands, one on either side of his face. I braid the first then the second, then bring them to the back of his head and fasten them together with a hair tie. I always liked it when he would leave his hair half and half down sometimes when we had missions in the living world. _

_He seems to notice that I've stilled and he turns his head to look at me. He's smiling, a sight that warms me to the core. I smile back and nod to tell him I'm done. He turns back to the mirror and examines what I have done. He seems pleased when he walks back over to me. He grins as if expecting something. I raise a brow, unsure of what he is thinking. _

"_What?" I ask._

_He chuckles at this and tilts his head in the direction of the chair. I turn to look at it then my brows furrow. What is he thinking? _

"_Sit," he finally says. _

_My head turns suddenly. Why would he-? Oh… Oh no, no, no. "No," I say._

_He chuckles again and I glare at him. It seems to have no affect unlike it did before we were together. He puts his hands on my shoulders and guides me down into the chair. I sigh as I look up into his laughing red-brown eyes. I narrow my eyes at him, and again it doesn't have the same affect. He just straightens and picks up the brush to brush out my own tumbled hair. I sigh again and just relax but brace myself for the painful tugs as he begins. My brows furrow again after a few minutes. It's odd to feel his large hands in my hair like this. I remember the first time he brushed out my hair he had pulled hard enough to make me wince, but this time his hands are careful, slow, and very gentle. _

_My eyes shift to gaze at him behind me through the corner of my eyes. He catches them and frowns. "It's not painful is it?" He asks quietly. _

"_No," I assure him. "I was just wondering how you are actually making it feel…pleasing." _

"_Ah," he says, looking very relieved that he's not hurting me. "Well, actually after having you brush my hair so many times, I picked up on a few things." _

"_Oh?" I say, wondering how observant he has really been._

_He nods. "Yeah," he says. It's a vague answer but I won't pry…yet. _

_I sit calmly in the chair waiting for him to finish. I can feel he's separating a piece of my hair on the side of my face into three separate strands and then weaves them into a braid. Once he's done he fastens it with a hair tie. I reach back to feel it, it's a fairly thin braid but not too thin nor too thick and the hair tie is red, one of the ones that that demon cat -Yoruichi hadn't stolen in my youth. I smile faintly and stand, turning to Renji. He grins wider and steps closer to me and captures my lips. _

_We indulge in a few kisses before we notice the door has opened and someone has come through and is staring. I pull away only slightly to turn my head to see that my cousin has come. She's smirking. She is so much like Yoruichi in that way. I notice her long purple hair is free from its usual style of one thick braid to it long wavy look with a braid on the side of her face. Her raven bangs still drift over her right eye as usual. _

"_I believe it isn't good luck that you will get from indulging in one another before the ceremony." She says, still smirking. _

_I frown and Renji shrugs. "We're just practicin'." He replies. _

_I roll my eyes at this and gently pull my way free of him. "I assume the reason you are here is because they are ready for us, ne?" I ask Mana._

_She nods and giggles. I narrow my eyes at her and she bites her lip to stifle them a bit. I shake my head gently; she's been spending far too much time with Senpai. She's been going to the living world to visit her much too often. _

_I sigh and take Renji's hand. "Come, Renji." I see from the corner of my eye that he's smiling as we start walking out of the room with Mana. As we get out to the walkway I see my family and Renji's and my friends gathered in the gardens._

_I spot Rukia where she has her cello. She's playing a soft welcoming tune for us. Renji has taught her well. Her eyes are closed and her arm is gracefully pulling the bow across the strings. She hits each note perfectly just as Renji does. She opens her eyes and she finds me with Renji and she smiles and keeps playing. I return her smile and she closes her eyes again._

_We walk down to the gardens and Mana places herself between Renji and me as we reach the isle. Rukia still plays as we start to walk down to where Head Elder Kameko is standing. She is smiling; the warmth reaches her bright red eyes. She is one of the very few who supported Renji's and my relationship. I wonder if that is because her father is a commoner and her mother is a Kuchiki noble. _

_As we reach the end of the isle just in front of Kameko, Mana takes my hands and Renji's and has us clasp them together. She then takes her place at my side and we wait for the head elder to start. _

"_We gather here today to join Kuchiki Byakuya and Abarai Renji together in holy matrimony." She begins. "Marriage is a bond that is most sacred and is required for those involved to be faithful and honor for one another. Do you both swear that you are seeking such bonds in honest and honorable purpose?"_

"_We do," Renji and I say together. I look into his eyes, I can get lost in those beautiful eyes. He smiles and squeezes my hands gently. I smile very softly in return. _

_Kameko nods and continues. "Now, if you will each share your vows and promises to one another, Byakuya-sama?"_

_I breathe deeply and begin to speak. But I get the uneasy feeling again in the pit of stomach. Renji seems to see this and looks at me questioningly. I take another deep breath and ignore the feeling. "Renji," I begin. I look down at our joined hands and then back up to his red-brown eyes. "We never know what will happen from moment to moment. Every day is something to be thankful for as we do not know what could come to pass. And I thank kami each day for having you brighten my life. Your love and loyalty is something I shall cherish every day for the rest of our lives as we are joined as life partners. I promise from this day forward to love and honor you and to be the person you can turn to for anything." _

_I can see his eyes fill with unbidden tears as his smile brightens. He blinks and breathes. "Byakuya," He says. "I think from the day I first met you even when I was obsessed to surpass you and get Rukia back, somewhere deep inside loved you. When you first told me that you had feelings for me, I didn't really think it was possible, but here we are. I'm thankful for having you in my life and for having you to love me every day. I'm unbelievably happy that I can be by your side as your life partner as we are joined. So, I promise from this day forward to love and honor you and to be the person you can turn to for anything." _

_I gently squeeze his hands and Kameko starts to speak again. I hardly notice anything going on around me as the ceremony slowly comes to a close and we exchange rings._

"_I now p—" Kameko says but she suddenly stops as we feel the reiatsu shift suddenly. The alarms sounded loudly and everyone draws their zanpakuto and flash stepping to their positions. _

"_What the hell?" I hear Renji exclaim. We flash step to our division and gather our men as we need and go to battle._

* * *

Renji sat quietly at his lover's side, holding his hand. His eyes shifted to the monitor hooked to the noble as it beeped loudly. "Byakuya?" He called. He noticed Byakuya's eyes were fluttering and his heart rate was speeding up. He flash stepped out of the room to Unohana-taichou.

"Unohana-taichou! There's something wrong with B-byakuya!"

_**((So, uh…don't kill me for the cliffy. Also, this is my first wedding I've ever written. :S So it's not very good but I think as I practice my writing more and more they should get better, ne? I looked up a lot of weddings and vows from movies, my own family's weddings, and other fanfics, and I just kinda threw them all together and that's the idea I got. :S Again, probably not my best work ever…but I think I did okay. :) Also since the manga's storyline is completely different from my own I thought I might as well change some things. No big, ne? SO, I hope you enjoy it and hopefully you understand a little bit more. ^_^ -Love Mina!))**_


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